A few light-hearted chuckles with the Federal Minister for Immigration.
She is just a LAUGH A MINUTE.
As this interview from last week's Herald Sun will attest:
'Steve Perkin: Minister, we noticed a photo of you at the Baxter Detention Facility and wondered if they were Aussie Rules goalposts behind you?
AV: There is an oval there. They play soccer and, if they want, Aussie rules.
SP: Is there an Aussie rules team?
AV: No. They've got a soccer team. A team from Post Augusta came and played them last night and won 4 - 1.
SP: If an AFL club saw a detainee and thought he was any good, could they draft him?
AV: NO. NO. FORGET IT. THEY'RE GOING HOME*.
SP: Do they play away games?
AV: We haven't looked at that. But we do have excursions out of the centre and, in the past, we have let kids out. So we would consider that.
SP: They'd struggle to find a ruckman.
AV: Speed. They've got speed. Like Byron Pickett when he ran down the ground for Port Adelaide so wonderfully**.
SP: Are there many Indonesians built like Byron Pickett?
AV: No, but we're talking about speed.
SP: At Baxter they've got a gymnasium, basketball court, pool table, table tennis table, badminton, cricket...it sounds pretty good***. Has anybody tried to break in?
AV: Well, the team from Port Augusta thought the ground was pretty good. We sent some people to Baxter from Villawood and they didn't want to go back. It's a pretty good oval, but there's no kiosk or pub you can go to afterwards.
SP: So who gets the footy when it's kicked over the fence?
AV: I suppose the guards go and get it, ROFLMAO LOLOLOLOLOL111!!!'
*She really said this. One can only imagine the look on her face when presented with similarly hilarious scenarios. Perhaps she completed the interview by jocularly kicking Steve Perkin in the nuts and eating his firstborn.
**Please note subtext: 1. They have speed because they crossed oceans in boats and nimbly attempted to dodge coast guards.
2. They are like Byron Pickett because they are brown.
***Doesn't it, though? They've also got suicide attempts, hunger strikes, post-traumatic stress disorder, tear gas and isolation cells. Book me in for my next adventure holiday, you wags.
523 days til the next election.
Comments
She....she actually said this? God Damn.
Well, she didn't actually say ROFLMAO. But I bet she was thinking it.
ROFLMAO, whether just thought to one's self or actually vocalised, is a perfectly acceptable response to such hilarity.
I ROFLMAO at that woman on a regular basis. This is wrong. Politicians are not SUPPOSED to be there to make us laugh...
The interviewer is quite astute isn't he? I like the question about drafting a player to the AFL.
Surely if a detainee was a good footy player we could keep him.
It would be 'unaustralian' not to.
But then again, maybe the AFL wouldn't want them.
They're a pretty homogenous lot the AFL. For instance, to date, no footy players have come out as gay, so I don't know how they'd go with a refugee.
Especially if he was a refugee AND gay.
Come on. You just can't take it when someone you don't like comes across quite well in an interview.
Perhaps I feel the Minister has more important things to worry about than whether the Baxter Detention Facility's football oval has a pub or a kiosk, anon.
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN FOOTBALL OVALS, PUBS AND KIOSKS, FITS?!?
AV: NO. NO. FORGET IT. THEY'RE GOING HOME*.
Of course they are - none of them are REAL refugees after all, are they Amanda? Hell, even if they are we're going to deport them - bloody refos wouldn't want to play footy anyway, just wogball. Hell, WHY DON'T WE JUST HAVE DIMIA SHOOT THE LOT OF THEM AND SAVE US SOME MONEY?
I'll stop chanelling a Liberal Party member now. *shudders*
And isn't Stevey not at all a racist little cunt:
"They'd struggle to find a ruckman" = "sand niggers and chinky chinks are all short and weedy, hahahahaha!!"
Clearly another quality Herald-Sun staffer.
Mandy Van knows how to pick her interviews/audiences these days. What a peach = Kong-size condom filled with porridge.
Ahhh, well, the inside running has it that she will be gone in a couple of months... I wonder if Phil will come back?
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK!
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