Reasons you will hate me

I also wouldn't mind finding out the trifecta for tomorrow and as sharing secrets seem to be popular in your Comments section, (simultaneously gob smacked and turned on I was with some of those 'fessions), please share if you are enlightened.

Do poor people exist in our egalitarian society?

Dear Fits,
Slaying Susan Smith (formerly Kennedy) will guarantee you a ticket downstairs. You have been warned.
G
ps nice rack

1. Susan kennedy used to be a tight package but after she lost her mind, she lost her looks and her husband.
Kill the bitch. I suggest she goes to prison and turns dyke snitch and gets shivved in the laundry by a large jealous Samoan woman.

2. Please refer to my previous point about women without men.

But- if he's useless in the sack only keep him if he'll cook, clean and iron.

3. Get on the div, railings, Leica Falcon and throw in a lightweight roughie as they always place.

4. Don't stress about the poor, the don't deserve it. i say to them "Thats what you get for doing B.Arts with a pysch major"

5. i've already forgotten what your other points were.

This Susan Kennedy thing is starting to look like a conundrum.

Harold came back. So can Kennedy.

Everything can work out.

Fuck this word verification thing shits me.

Oh and as a post script on a completely different Melb Cup tangent, could i please register my nomination for "worst haircut of the year- 2005" to the flowing Croatian mullet being sported by Tony Santic. Its not even business up front party down back, its salt and pepper party all over.

Susan's fine. The Bishops are history.

But his Dad did it, so I reckon David will come back one day. It runs in the family; just like having the high ambition of making it into the Erinsborough Salvation Army marching band.

I thought that David's corpse would be washing up shortly. It's Liljana and Serena that are never found. They're probably off with Dee somewhere.

I love Neighbours.

How about a show about forensics and retarded nurses and set it in a little town in the middle of bumfuck that in real life is a cesspit but that magically turns into a haven for good-looking intelligent professionals all having affairs with each other?

You could even spin in some crap about an artist and conspiracies about the catholic church.

I dunno, I think even God would give up on trying to feed the tastebuds of mass consumption.

*raises mountain goat in commiseration*

Hot tip for the cup: No. 6, Eye Popper. This was given to me by an alcoholic who runs a pub = Iron Clad.

The secrets are safe with you and god and the DSD.

I'm still working on my pilot of CSI: Baton Rouge City. It's basically a lot of white cops investigating crimes scenes by picking their teeth and saying "we reckon a black person done it!"

I meant, of course, that Eye Popper would run 6th.

is it too late to ask about the don's smallgood RANGE in the underwear?

RANGE?

how many does he have?

Up there for thinking! Sooo uplifting! Boy oh boy! Everywhere I go these days it's the tale of the dog and the shadow.

Here's an idea you should put into practice on your little radio program: review People magazine to the repeated strain of "People...
people who need People...are the luckiest people...in the worrrld". Needless to say, it should be a recording of some crazy crooner the likes of which Donny from Blokes You Can Trust used to play.

And here's another idea for your show: discuss the book Female Chauvinist Pigs by Ariel Levy with The Word's Tracee Hutchison.

God knows your little program could do with some ADULT content. Boy oh boy!

Bring back Toby Mangels and Bouncer.

I know Bouncer died, but if Harold can return from the dead so can a dog.

And Toby has grown up to look pretty hot.

I am poor form in the sack?

If I don't know your name Anonymous I can't answer that one.

I'm going now. I still believe your little rebellion against Christianity is in reality a rebellion against the secular humanism advocated by the likes of Confucious and Nietzsche, but I can't compete against the latest issue of Men's Health with the headline: Porn is good. Corn is bad.

Besides, the time is swiftly approaching when I will tear out the artificial heart of The Age, nay, the mainstream media in Melbourne, and hold it up for the world to see. True? Ya-ya-ya! Blue? Ya-ya-ya! Due? Ya-ya-ya! Sue? Ya-ya-ya!

Um, that would be Confucius.

What was that? To say you're really a pro-Christian impediment to humanism becoming the guiding light in this country is like saying Joan "What if God was one of us?" Osbourne is more popular than Ozzy Osbourne?

Really, one could be excused for thinking you weren't excited when you first heard Nirvana's Lithium and Scentless Apprentice.

P.S. You smell, Mel. Can you hear that bell?

I'm really going this time, but before I do I have to tell you something. Yes, I too have a confession to make. Ready? I haven't read anything on your blog beyond the headings and your profile. I guess that's not so surprising, in considering I have never taken issue with anything specific on your blog besides the photo. But wait! There's more! I have only listened to a few minutes of your radio program in total and I only saw a few minutes of Last Man Standing. The truth is I only really know you through what I have read in newspapers. There, I feel much better now. Bye.