Reasons you will hate me

What about "Six"?

My friend had a baby a couple of weeks ago and gave her the middle name "Soleil".

I'm a child of the 80s and have to admit I think Alf and Kit are adorable names.

For twins particularly, Anon.

Whatchu talkin' 'bout Willis?

What about Max, Jack and Zac?

Or am I hopelessly behind the times?

you also omitted:

sloth

chunk

that is all.

What about Blair, Natalie, Jo, Molly or Tootie?

Pippy.

...But of course!

Turbo

Chunk

Also:

Mallory

Skip

wheels is a big favorite of mine.

I challenge any one of you to name your child 'Chunk', heathens.


Bonus points if you can convince him/her to perform the Truffle Shuffle on command.

Ive been watching a lot of 21 Jump Street on DVD lately and I like the names Booker and Penhall for boys. Hanson cant be used cos it was ruined by those evil blonde children of the corn singers from the 90's and that red headed fuckwit from Queensland. Plus the theme song from the show could be a big one at weddings and/or funerals/births. Id probably much prefer the closing theme to be played at my funeral,however, Ive already earmarked the Incredible Hulk closing theme music to be played at my funeral but I digress.

Oh and Hans Solo, Darth and Leia.
I know some young men who would seriously try and name their sons He-Man if their partners would let them.

Gizmo might suffice, if the kid was cute enough.

Have to be pretty damn cute.

Not Optimus? We can't add that one to the list? Or Lion-O?

Or Miles Mayhem, Prince Adam, Splinter, BraveStarr, Happy Pants, Hot Lixx, Scrunchie, Jem... ?

Slapband?

Riot, X, Ritzy Riche, Buzz,or, quite likely Bob.

What about Danger Mouse or Penfold?

I like She-Ra.

Maculey

Punky, Blossom, Webster, Willis, Data, Pee Wee. And I'm naming my firstborn Metal Mickey.

bill? ted?

Re Danger Mouse (btw loved that cartoon). I was rather impressed when my cousin gave her son the middle name of Danger.
I think we can guess what his pick up line will be when he's older.

But you can't go past some of the latest crazes in 'Bogan' names going around these days...

What about Tayla, Chardonney (Actual spelling) or Mercedes.

My personal favourite, which I saw at work last week, is Samurai...

Just brilliant that is.

Leonardo, Michaelangelo, Rafael and Donatello.

Or worse, Gargamel.

What kind of hideous parent calls their child 'Gargamel'?


The mind boggles, it really does.

Dexter

http://www.nostalgiacentral.com/tv/variety/perfectmatch.htm

Smurfette?

re: what kind of parent would call their child Gargemel

Perhaps one that is against Smurf communism?

How about megaton, ming the merciless, or count duckula

Or even Valentine - like James valentine from monday munchies.

James' metal mickey suggestion a few lines back wins the prize IMO.

'He weighs half a ton (he weighs half a ton) and he's a lot of fun (and he's a lot of fun)! So look out! look out! (cue dodgy synth music)'

man, that's a prime example of 80's fattism right there.

Mr T is good, especially if your son looks like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjkSbmAtmNY

My ex and I were going to have Toyah for a girl:

http://www.pure80spop.co.uk/Images/poppics/Toyah.jpg

and Limahl for a boy:
http://www.limahl.com/gallery/galleries/kajagoogoo/limahl_with_kajagoogoo_miscellaneous/kajagoogoo_%20copyright_emi_%20photo_sheila_rock.html

Good thing we broke up, really....

We named our son Jonah, but when no one else is around, I call him Man At Arms.

Our daughter will be named Jem. For she will be truly outrageous.

I always wished I was called Hannibal.

I pity da foo' who names their kid 'Mr. T'

what about Boner?

that was the name of Mike's best friend in Growing Pains

and Adam West randomly pissed himself laughing about his name when he was dressed as a British royal guard protecting Quagmire in an episode of Family Guy

Pugwall?

Portablenat, I salute you.

I think BA, Murdoch, Hannibal and Face are perfectly reasonable names. Especially for girls.

The South Australian register of births is the go-to site to see what baby names are big in Adelaide right now.

2006 had a Bastian, a Kit, two Anakins and a Dazza. Plus one sad boy named Dakota.

Among the girls, never mind Chardonnay when you can name your kid Zinfandel! There's also a Spiral-Moon, an Experience, and of course Taeylah, Taihla, Tailah, Tayla, Taylah, Tayler, and Taylor.

Oi! Mercedes was a girl's name before it was a car ...

re: what kind of parent would call their child Gargemel

..or maybe just one who have just necked a whole smurf village of magic mushrooms

...seriously? Someone has actually named their kid Experience?
You have to hope she has a good surname too.

h, that register is kind of sad ...

Poor little:
Alex-Zander, Lucafer, Remmington, Man, Loklan, Linkin, La, Jaxon (how are there TWO Jaxons?) Anastasia-Angle (if that's a typo, it's not mine) AND OMFG THERE IS A DAZZA

You are in our prayers ...

Potsie

Ralph Malph...


I had 2 guinea pigs called The Fonz and Pinky Tuscadero..

Oh and I forgot to mention that my cat Jaws ate my guinea pigs.

I'm not kidding. What mother lets there 7 yr old girl name a ginger cat Jaws????

Everyone seems to be overlooking Mork.

And Bender. I quite like the idea of naming a child Bender.

we just had a girl and have called her drew. also, my partner breastfeeds in front of Press Gang on DVD.

It's not Kit, it's K.I.T.T. And what about Joanie and Chachi or Thurston Howell the Third? I reckon they're better than today's "name your girl" after a redneck US State trend, like Montana or Dakota, Dakohteh, Dhakota or Dakohtah. Ewww!

*Shudders and falls off barstool

I may be falling into the nineties (and the mid nineties at that), but how about


Nudge



And Stephen

in honour of Stephen Patrick Morrissey and Steven William Bragg

Thalesian said...

Chardonney (Actual spelling)

Surely it would be 'Shardanay'?

What kind of hideous parent calls their child 'Gargamel'?

I don't know - has kind of a celtic ring to it.

It's no worse than holding your beautiful, newborn baby girl in your arms and thinking "I reckon you look like a Blodwyn".

http://www.babynamesworld.com/meaning_of_Blodwyn.html

Magical_M: I hope you're talking of the Bender circa The Breakfast Club, and not the Bender from Futurama. Although lovable and scallywag-esk, I'm not sure our robot pal falls into the category of '88.

How bout calling your kid Expo? now THATS '88! Talk about the best breakup excuse ever. "But baaaaby, thats my NAME."

For twin girls, the following names would be respectable:

Mel, and Kim.

Tyrone, obviously.

recent births in my (red)neck of the woods; Texas, KC, Noah.

But the worst name I've heard recently belongs to a 26 year old Scottish lass - Vadawn! WTF?

of course Taeylah, Taihla, Tailah, Tayla, Taylah, Tayler, and Taylor.

And I bet they will grow up in Elizabeth.

True 80s Aussie kids will be selling themselves short if they don't call their kids Vortex and Plankton.

Also, I like the new trend of calling kids a full character name plus their surname, like:

"Scott Robinson" Smith

or

"Strawberry Shortcake" Menzies

or (actual example)

Luke Skywalker Jones.

PS what is smurf communism and how come I don't know about it?

I know a kid called Chilli ...

In the Taeylah, Taihla, Tailah, Tayla, Taylah, Tayler, and Taylor category, how about the bogan trend of using a regular name with "special" spelling, a la Bilynda and Kadee. And there's also Jodhi.

Jorja

Having being watching some classic Degrassi on ABC2 recently, you can't go past Joey Jeremiah (Jeremiah would clearly make a great middle name, or maybe it should be hyphenated). Also, Spike is a great name, provided you style their hair like that from birth.

Crocket? Tubbs?

you people looking down your nose at alternative name spellings ... so quick to judge ... tsk tsk ... Did it ever cross your narrow minds that maybe the parents consulted a numerologist before arriving at the spelling? Like Jodhi Meares and advertising guru Siimon Reynolds? Look at them! Successful, pretty, happy. Walking advertisements for the truth of numerology. How could it be wrong? You all make me sick.

Better to breastfeed in front of Press Gang on DVD than breastfeeding in front of the actual Press Gang.

I know it's 90s, but I know a Tony Blair. And timeless classics: brothers called Superman and Spiderman!

you quite simply cannot go past Doogie.

I'm glad no one has said Optimus Prime yet, because I'm saving that for my firstborn.

(as an aside, this comment took me three tries, so please forgive me if there are a few repeats)

Guys, I love bad baby names. Please check out this website:

http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/bestof.html


Personally, I think us Gen-Xers with our obsession for social status via material consumption have been responsible for some prententious clangers as we try to advertise our apparent 'status' via naming practices for our children. Just visit a Bowral (a pretentious town in NSW) primary school and check the school rolls for Clementine, Woodroffe and ewwww spewww: Oscar (do they hate their kids?)! All in the name of proving you're 'up there' in social status (along with the 4WD that never goes off road), but really saying: "I'm a pretentious middle-class twat!"

My children are growing amongst a sea of Maxes, Jacks, Thomases, Madisons, Emilys, Olivers, Zacs, Caitlins, Harrys, and now Rubys, Lilys etc etc. Recycling the crusty old names of my dead relatives in the name of upping your social status makes me SICK!!!

I'm more of a 90's child so this was a little bit hard for me but oh, now I've got one!

First name: Bush
Second: Tucker
Surname: Man

Hmm, maybe not, but I loved that show when I was five.

AJ, I think the Boomers started that trend.

Seems it's the same, if not worse, in NZ. My Dad just sent me this.

He can't be serious, though, who would call their daughter Titty Maxi?

Oh dear, Secret Wombat, is numerology the reason I'm not successful, pretty and happy? Darn. Will my luck change if I change the spelling, do you think? How about A'nnon E Mouse? ;)




amkpfuk: what happens when you overload your amplifier

Hi! I don't know who 'tantrik' is but I have a feeling i might be that Scottish lass your talking about! It think Vadawn is a fab name - would recomend it to anyone - at least it's a wee bit differnt!