Reasons you will hate me

Friday q and a 92.

NOW WITH NEW EXCITING MONDAY UPDATE SEE BELOW THANK YOU FOR LISTENING.





Hasn't it been a long time between q and a meanderings? I find it much nicer this way - dipping in and out like a magical book nerd faerie. I'm well settled in Sydlee and enjoying myriad strolls to the Bourke Street Bakery, along with early evening dinners and random encounters with bearded celebrities making a fuss of my dog (that's right, Noah Taylor lives in my hood).


Anyhow. This is probably going to take me some time. Let's settle down and swim through some Friday questions like a school of brightly-coloured fish set to be eaten by a whale.

Anonymous said...
What a lovely collection of questions and corresponding (if often tangential) answers. I commend you.

On the topic of the two gingers and the famous guy (a much catchier band name, no?), are you planning to overthrow Kingsmill and surreptitiously place them on high rotation? I believe that would be the stand up thing to do. Power to the people.

Also, being this time of year, I'm feeling quite obliged to wish you a merry christmas/ joyous new year/good wishes/ blessings to your families chickens etc.

Thanks for the festive wishes Anon, though to be honest it's really showing up how fucking long it's taken for me to update my Friday questions. In answer to your query, yes. I am slowly but surely poisoning Richard Kingsmill by serving him bathtub gin fashioned from raw juniper berries. The day he turns somewhat pale and topples over in the record library is THE DAY TRIPLE J PLAY BACK TO BACK BASICS.

vinonymous said...
Wow, you shaved your head TWICE? I shaved all mine off last week in exchange for 2 grand in donations to the Leukaemia Foundation. It was really sandpapery at first but now it's feeling somewhat velvety (I'm great with adjectives, aren't I?). I can't stop touching it, which is really bad in peak hour traffic when I have to try and turn corners with one hand when there's no green arrow.

This was leading somewhere... oh yes, how quickly did your hair grow back? And why did you do it in the first place?

I did it in the first place because I am a) a twit, and b) an erstwhile Beastie Boys obsessive who once convinced herself that she could most likely become an awesome skateboarder given the right pair of oversized cord pants and a pair of Converse one stars. My poor horrified parents. It grew back in an entirely offensive 'puffy' style and I resembled for a time an eleven-year-old Italian magician pulling dice tricks in the garage. The only thing missing was my bowtie. No you may not see a photograph.

richard_watts said...
"While we're here, thank you so much for that tea-towel you gave me with the picture of two men having robust anal sex printed on it. I think it's absolutely wonderful."

You're most welcome - I can't think of anyone more deserving of such a gift, and I'm sure it will make a fine talking point the next time your remarkable parents visit...or anyone, really.

Yes, it's certainly been a setpiece here in Surry Hills. Anyone else with enjoyably strange tea-towels please do feel free to send them my way.

BEVIS said...
I have another question in my series of burning questions to ask you, but I'll do that later.

For now, I just had to say how wonderful I thought your answer to how babies are made was.

That was a poorly constructed sentence, but you get the idea. It was a genius response.

If I wasn't sitting at my computer naked, I'd tip my hat to you.

Can't you just tip your penis instead? It would probably be more interesting for all concerned.

Ms. Wright said...
I think I'm jealous of Ms. Fits tea towel collection. Lucky thing.

-Also a question: Really a marriage off this blog? Do they still post on here etc?

-Also a statement: Congrats on the job, the big scary move and doing the big scary move with the fella while you're getting up at 4:30am 5 days a week. Talk about jumping in feet first. It's quite nice I think.

Bevis- I'd be doing some hat tipping too, but I'm in the same position you are. Page 27 of the karma sutra.*



*snare drum please

Hello, Ms. Wright.


Here we go....


1. Sadly, they are no longer together as far as I'm aware. The newish romance, however, is going such great guns that cohabitation is currently in motion and glorious. I hope you're all wearing your Sunday best. You never know who you might meet in q and a comments.



2. Isn't it? And thus far it's proved rather a successful venture. Going to bed at 8:30pm may be crippling socially, but who needs late-night fun times when you can start drinking at 2 in the afternoon?

Goose said...
Hello Ms. Fits!

I am delighted to hear that you are joining the team at JJJ! I attend the university right across the road from the ABC so I might bump into you when I trek from one lecture theatre to another (in the past, I have crossed paths with Kerry O'Brien and a handful of lovelies from The Chaser).

I do realise I haven't asked a question. I'm just excited.

x

Please do make yourself known if we happen to cross paths, Goose. I'll be the one staggering across Harris street with a dazed expression and an opened can of Coke Zero.

Lou said...
Any remedies for the hunover guilt fest of the morning after the night before? I had the most suitably rock n roll crazy drinking and dancing and telling people to fuck off night at the Divinyls. Yet I wake up with that sick guilt in my stomach. Perhaps I consume too much alcohol, but who wouldn't at such an event? Please suggest something other than to "stop drinking" because that would send me over the edge.

I would never suggest such an appalling course of action, Lou. All you need to do in a similar situation is eat some sardines on toast and have a nice bath and read David Sedaris. I defy anyone to wallow in the muddy dregs of a hangover after such restorative behaviour.


Additionally, do try not to berate yourself overly if you've kicked up the heels in a somewhat haphazard fashion. Obviously alcohol is a depressant and you're more likely to wallow in its miserable wake if you've pummeled your poor liver with absinthe bomb after absinthe bomb. Have a nice cup of tea and remind yourself how lovely the world can be sometimes. It will pass, I promise.

Stump Of Knowledge said...
Whoever suggested the inner-west of Sydney for your new digs was spot on. Wander around a while before settling, but you sound to me like you'd be most at home in Newtown or Glebe. Or maybe Rozelle. Or the dodgy end of Balmain. Check out the markets at Glebe every Saturday (at the schoolgrounds on Glebe Pt Rd) and Rozelle on Saturday/Sundays (Darling St Rozelle - also a schoolground affair). Go to Il Cugino on Norton St at Leichhardt for great pizza or up the road to Bar Italia for cheap-but-good pasta. Norton St Grocer (lower level at the plaza on Norton St) is a foodie's delight. Recommended pubs: the Riverview in Balmain for a quiet ale/reading of book (just beware Paddy McGuinness - a regular). The Rose in Chippendale for its beer garden. The Annandale on Parramatta Rd for live bands.
I suppose I should ask a question....Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama?

God bless you good people and all your Sydlee suggestings. Just this afternoon we ran into a talkative old lady near the Brett Whitely gallery who pointed us in the direction of three wondrous pasta places 'which I would know all about, as I spend nine months of the year in Florence. Although I am a fabulous cook myself'.


To be honest, I'm a little helplessly infatuated with Surry Hills. Is that wrong?



p.s. Barack. But I'm not voting him because he's black. I'm voting for him BECAUSE HE'S BRILLIANT.






p.p.s. I'm not actually voting for him at all.

Andy Pants said...
It seems you have a fair few melbournite readers. So I would like to post a flyer if I could. I need a place to saty when I hightail it to Melbourne in the next few weeks. I'm willing to crash almost anywhere small with cheap rent and people who don't mind the sound of music-making.

Any help would be grandly appreciated.

Has this time passed, AP? You seem a very decent chap and I've always admired your commentary. I'm sorry I can't open the doors of chez Johnston to you, but I don't live there anymore.

Andy Pants said...
Also... Newtown fucking rocks.

As long as you don't mind the ominous ever-present sound of planes flying overhead.

I don't, actually. It reminds me of the war.

Shezbo said...
Domanda is the Italian word for question..so even if I wanted to take credit for it, I couldn't. Blame the mafia, if you will.

I second Glebe or Newtown.
and I am also across the road from the ABC being a laid back kicking uni student but have only ever spotted one chaser and he was in a hurry.

La question: Are you a morning person?

Not overly, but I'm adjusting. Back in the days when I was only freelance writing and no-one was forcing me to get up O FOR THOSE HEADY CAREFREE DAYS OF YORE I still managed to rise and shine reasonably early and drag Bob Ellis up the road for a coffee before Collingwood managed to rouse itself from its slumber.



Still. 4:45am? Someone must be having a fucking laugh.

fox drink water said...
The inner west is indeed the land of milk and honey. To be in the thick of things, go for Newtown, Enmore or Balmain, for a slightly quieter (but still fun) time, head for Stanmore, Petersham, Annandale, Leichhardt. The yummiest gelato in Sydney is Gelatomassi in Newtown. The loveliest sauve dinner is Oscillate Wildly in Newtown. If you like being near water, Clovelly and Bronte are fetching beachside suburbs in the east. Perhaps you should post your must-have qualities in a suburb and we Sydney types can offer suggestions?

Must-have qualities in Sydney suburb - big trees, above-par range of dining establishments, close walk to Ultimo, oversized park nearby for Bob Ellis, halfway decent pub free of fucking gambling equipment and braying chaps in cable-knit sweaters shouting about their benz, a cinema, old ladies keen to share dining tips and talk about art.

Frank from Abbotsford said...
No question, just best wishes: Smith St won't be the same without you (mind you, these days I hardly ever go there) but I'm sure your presence will refresh the parts of Sydney that others cannot reach. Best wishes for your new job - I might even listen if I can find it on the wireless dial. chookas, Frank F.A.

Thanks, Frank. I wouldn't expect you to tune into the Jays without first training yourself with repeated listenings of Cut Copy and something mysteriously known as a Pharoahe Monch, but it's kind of you to even consider. Do please keep those miraculous ham hock beans at Cavallero warm til I make my way back to them.

sublime-ation said...
oh yes, as I am sickeningly internerd addicted I am familiar with the anus thoughts. (If you are listening, oh brilliance, please update...)
As for reading the 'real' one, I just occasionally like to check out what 'they' are up to etc....I've said before here how journalistic sources have told me that he used to be a bit of a lefty, and it's all an act, designed to appease the 'common man' by the powers that be/own the H.Scum, and I find it endlessly fascinating how one can write such insincere dribble with such apparent conviction.
Maybe Bolty had a leftish love, who broke his heart, and he changed sides, holding her responsible for all that is fair and reasonable, I can see the musical now, kind of like a more horrific Hunchback of Notre Dame...I could speculate forever but as my father keeps telling me I shouldn't really waste time/thoughts on such a twit.
I shall send more foodie Sydney ideas as I think of them...there's a great Italian cafe that does good coffee (shock! horror!) in Bondi Beach, just off the main drag, must remember what it's called.
Happy Christmas to you and give your lovely Ma my love.
x

Our friend Andrew used to write teen angst poetry as a young man, you know. Perhaps the strain to create another bitching rhyming couplet was all too much for him and he turned his mind to evil and witchcraft and amusingly mixed metaphors and aren't we the luckier for it?

Rowena said...
Happy Sexy-mas to you and Hair of Fire, dear Ms Fits x

And merry pool table pashing new year's to you, lady.

The Colonel said...
Walrus like indeed...Why I should whip you with a wooden spoon while singing God save the King...But I gather you'd enjoy that....The wooden spoon, not God save the King!
I am 5 feet 11 and still whip thin. I do have a mustache but it was condition of my Knighthood in 24 that I grew one. Surely you like the idea of being mounted by a Knight? My horse loves the idea!!
Oh well my little communist enjoy Sydney. If I could, I'd buy the ABC and set you to work as my personal assistant....You'd enjoy that...Lots of wooden spoons and razors for shaving..
And to the impertinent swine who compared me to Gollumn...I knew Tolkein. Damned wretch always going on about saving middle earth. Gollumn was based on my manservant at the time. he used to dribble and carry on about stealing my ring. Must have been a queer!!!!

You'll be pleased to note that I am surrounded by many communist poofo queers at my new place of employment. Every morning we share Maoist philosophy and bow before anything painted a shade of red. You should witness the frothing fits at Playschool when a fire truck passes.

EC said...
No question, just a big best wishes for the festive season to you Ms Fits. Thanks for your advice this year too.

All the best for you and your beloved ginger bloke with the Sydney move.

You are all very kind. I forgot what a nice exercise q and a could be sometimes, amongst all the tastefully polite reminders about what a pea-brained fuckstick I am.

Kaleu Big said...
Calisthenics b4 work. Do you exercise? What’s your idea of it ?

Do the town bikes have a Calisthenics workout video? Have you ever rehearsed with them? I only recently saw footage of them (excuse my ignorance) but man they can swing their hips, there hip swinging should be classed illegal, it could take out an elephant

Was there anything outrageous you had to do at the interview for your new job? like Ruby

http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/story/0,23663,22807312-10388,00.html

Thank you for your word play in 07.Health and happiness for you in 08.I enjoyed reading, especially your comments on Bindi

Merry Getpissedmas

Hello, Kaleu.


1. I walk a lot every day - home from work, then again later in the day roaming the streets with Bob Ellis dodging saucer-eyed nightclub attendees. Occasionally I go to the gym and stare openly at the 800-year-old lady with fake boobies and supertight gladwrap face working at reception WHY DOES SHE DO THIS TO HERSELF. I'm a lazy person by nature, so it helps me to get away from all the sedentary parts of my job(s) and work up a fine sheen of perspiration once in a while. That said, I prefer doing eight parts of fuck-all.




2. The beauteous Town Bikes have sadly not yet released an exercise video, but I'll be sure to put in a good word.



3. I've danced with Gabi way back in the day, but in terms of actually 'rehearsing' with the Bikes the closest I've come is casting an eye over a routine and making some directorial suggestions.




They asked me, you know. I didn't just turn up and start throwing my weight around.





4. I didn't actually do an interview for this new job. I co-hosted a couple of times in the afternoons with Robbie and then management asked if I'd be interested in uprooting my entire life and moving to a strange state and cutting myself off from close friends and family in order to wake up pre-dawn and talk absolute arse on radio to which I replied WHERE DO I SIGN.

I'm not Craig said...
What Bevis said.

(In the previous Q&A, obvs. Nothing to do with the computer related nudity)

Happy New Year, also.

Too late! But thank you.

Hellglitter said...

Hey Fitsalicious
Go with the Glebe option. It's closer to work and has a fine selection of eateries. I lived in Newtown when it was full of rocking pubs but the only thing its full of these days is itself.
There is a damn fine coffee place along Devonshire St, between Elizabeth and Chalmers streets, run by two glamorous looking ex circus people. Hubby still performs little magic tricks with a glowing thumb and his wife was an aerialist (their son is currently travelling around Europe doing similar circus things). The staff are delightful, left of centre loonies who are utterly charming. And best of all, out the back, is a nice quite outside area with rickety wobbling tables.
But even better of all, it's not one of those popular, must-be-seen-in-the-window places, it's just a charming little nook with decent coffee.
Glad to see you in the Emerald City where the harbour was God's work (apparently) and the city the devil's.
Hmm, that's not a question is it.....okay..um.. well since I'm moving to Melbourne in a year, where should a couple with one kid who are both into the arts, like the rush of the city and demand good coffee every morning choose to live?

Circus coffee! As I live and breathe.



In answer to your question I'd suggest Brunswick or East Brunswick or Preston. Excellent coffee, first-rate food, and tramming distance to the big smoke. Hurry in before the rental prices equal that of Sydlee's and you're priced out of the market like bereft refugees.

Names are not important.. said...
No more questions about JJJ, the dog or the boyfriend, I promise. This relates to your blog hookup service, as noted in Q&A#91. I was just wondering what happened to that cute Murakami fan. Turns out I've been stuck waiting in a phone booth for seven months. The door doesn't open outwards, and it rains every day, but thankfully the white cat delivers pepperoni pizza and two cans of beer every evening right on sunset. It's right about sunset that the same fire engine races past under lights and siren. In fact, the very same procession of cars and people glides by every day. They don't notice me. I gave up shouting at them long ago. I look out into the street, hoping to notice the cute girl carrying a Murakami novel under her arm. She never does, which is a shame, as I feel she may be linked to my escape from this goddamned phone booth. I fear I am stuck here for some time. Perhaps you could get a message to her. With thanks.

...and the RYWHM dating service continues. Murakami fan, if you're out there, your chariot awaits.

Anonymous said...
i sorta get the feeling ..... he isn't gonna fuck it up.....

http://canberra.yourguide.com.au/news/local/general/rudd-serves-canberras-needy/1152068.html

*misty eyes*

Time will tell, Anon. Let's all cast our eyes to February 13th and see what stirrings we feel when ol' K07 gets down on his knees and makes nice with that mob who were kind of here first.

shanel said...
The last I heard the show was called 'Robbie, Marieke and The Doctor'.

Surely it has to be 'Bucky, Marieke and the Doctor'?

That would be confusing for at least a small portion of the blogosphere, sir.

Andy Pants said...
If you're equal to a slave, how are you free?

Who, me personally? Or human beings in general? Do you work for some kind of sneaker manufacturer? Your slogans are sounding suspiciously like something that would accompany a commercial where a lady in tight leggings goes jogging through a waterfall.

Anonymous said...
I almost threw up when I pulled out the A2 today.

What a great pity for you, Anon. I don't wish an upset stomach on anyone outside of Jackie O and even then I'd probably lend her some Quick-Eze once she was finished harking her stomach lining all over the bathroom tiles.

curious said...
that's not a normal reaction is it?

how do you go pulling off an A4?

ZING.

Anonymous said...
You tell me. I pulled it out (of the rest of the prospective cat litter bed), not off.

Masturbating Newspaper Supplements 101. Gosh, I can see why this blog's been nominated for an award.





Wait, now I remember. It's the highbrow comments like this one:

Anonymous said...
I once got pulled off in an Audi A4. It was excellent and was one of the many times I was pleased to have leather seats. Gobs of semen aside, my paramour was knickerless and very juicy. And that was before I finger fucked her g-spot causing her to expel three big squirts. I just wiped the leather down with a chamois which I later rinsed out. I don't know how I would have coped with cloth seats.

Maybe all this is lost on the RYWHM readership who I picture driving around in beaten up 70's Holdens and Valiants with unhygienically grimed up, dog fur covered vinyl seats. Oh the filth. Get a real job (JJJ are hiring) and buy a nice car. Fucking Hippies.

'Expel three big squirts'? I hope no-one's partway through their Weetbix right now.

teaspoon said...
Hi Anon (from last thread),

If you're still around, I'm game if you are!

x
teaspoon

Is this a dating thing again? Can it be dusted off or have I shamefully left it too late for love to bloom?

Omitting the ID fields increases your risk of being mistaken for spam said...
Although not obligatory to check your individuality at the door on entering JJJ (see Myf Warhurst), JJJ groupthink has subsumed more promising talents than yourself into its pseudo commercial, high rotation, all things to all yoof belly.

I don't think you've made the wrong choice necessarily but I suggest fortifying yourself and hitting the place with elevated attitude and impertinance as a sort of ambit claim to back down from ever so slightly.

Let's face it. You are no Fee Bee Squared and never will be. That woman is without peer. What I'd be asking myself if I were you is whether you really want to be a Kate Langbroek (/me throws up into own mouth) because it seems you are not far off that trajectory.

Just Sayin'....

Thanks for the career advice, Omitting the ID fields increases your risk of being mistaken for spam. Although to be honest, anyone who decides to waltz in with the patronising 'Let's face it, you are no (insert name here) and never will be, dollface' pretty much cancels themselves out as someone I wish to pay an overt amount of attention to, so feel free to continue pounding your fist against the pub table and holding court on the relative merits and failings of women in radio and their poor choices. In the interim, I shall carry on living my life as I see fit and you can bite me.

Ms Anonymous said...
Happy New Year! Woo! *pops streamers* And all of that.

What were your favourite music and film releases of 2007?

Music - Eddy Current Suppression Ring's record, or The Pink Fits.


Film - I loved This Is England, though it's hard to wave a flag for it when Raging Bull and Withnail and I were both re-released. Still. Killer soundtrack.




*********************************


MONDAY Q AND A UPDATE:




Okay, so I said I was going to finish q and a over the weekend. But sue me, I got 'involved' in work and sunshiney saunterings and soft-boiled eggs with vegemite soldiers (this is an outrageously good hangover cure, folks). Don't be impatient with me.

Rustique said...
I am presently broke thanks to Xmas and a family member's upcoming nuptials. I also have time off work over the festivus season - what is there to do in this fair city (i.e. Melbourne) for free that is fun (and can be done in public without fear of reprisal or police action)?

Besides chips what is your favourite method of potatoe cookage?

1. Gosh, there's plenty you can do in a starry-skied city with barely a bean and a whistle to your name, Rustique. I'm a fan of propping in a prominent location and people-watching, or lying in the dirt next to Merri Creek with a book and a muesli bar, or bin-scabbing on Sydney road. Anyway, my suggestions aren't really a patch when you consider 100 things to do in Melbourne and get a load of these:


'Hop on a tram, wander along Southgate, smell the burning autumn leaves and look at the cars parked on the lawns of suburban homes as they make their way to the footy, have a barby down by the Yarra, indulge in an Acland Street cake, dodge the spray-and-squirt brigade at the entrance to Myers, dance at a Greek wedding, feed the possums in the park, abuse the umpire at the Gee, pick up a bargain at Forges or Dimmeys, meet someone under the clocks, listen to a mixture of traffic sounds, bagpipes and St. Paul's bells at the corner of Swanston and Flinders streets, be individually humiliated at a comedy venue, do the block, endure wax burns at Carols by Candlelight, drink champagne in the mud in the carpark at the Melbourne Cup, see the latest blockbuster at the Princess, imagine the photos hidden away in the Grainger Museum, go to a fashion parade in the Mural Hall, watch the old diggers make their way to The Shrine on Anzac Day, have a pizza in Lygon Street at 2 in the morning, talk to a stranger in the street, visit Chloe at Young and Jacksons, enjoy a Leunig cartoon, jostle through the crowds at the Vic Market, have afternoon tea at the Windsor, visit Pharlap in the museum, not have to make an appointment before dropping in on friends, sip champagne under the stars at the Music Bowl, endure (and enjoy) four seasons in one day, BYO, take a guided tour of the cemetery, watch the wedding photo circus in the park, look at the iron lace on the balconies, watch a Franco Cozzo ad, take the kids to see the Myers Christmas windows, visit the Weary Dunlop statue, have a game of backyard cricket, bag Sydney, wear what you feel like, listen to the bag lady play the piano in David Jones, row your special friend up the Yarra at Studley Park, worry about the bushfires, potter about in the backyard - and eat some great, fresh cheap food at any time of day! '



That's right. Bin-scabbing on Sydney road. You heard it here first.






2. Roasted with garlic and so much salt your arteries harden just looking at them.

Anonymous said...
Sam de Brito is indeed a fuckwit, he was offered a 'special service' from this lady http://www.lucy-blake.com/ when he bitched on his blog about poor service at a suburban brothel and he turned it down!

Turning down a free trick from a prostitute? WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN.

zzymurgy said...
dear fits,

sorry I haven't called, it's been a busy election campaign as I'm sure you're aware. (Although the Bob Brown love cushion is still a glaring unforgivable omission from Polichicks. (Latham has retired. Give him a break.))

I just wanted to ask, is it you on the cold sore tablet ad? It's hard to tell, but the outfit at least looks like something you'd be seen in.

What, this?






That's not me. And what do you mean, 'the outfit'? I don't make a habit of hiding behind venetian blinds peeking out and hiding my lip sores from the world. And why would I do an advertisment for a cold sore cream when I'm clearly rolling buck naked in cash thrown at me by the national broadcaster?

Anonymous said...
Did someone forget to close an italics tag?



Is that better

'Someone' did, and I know who that 'someone' was. I have fixed the problem and I am not outing them as I am not Derryn Hinch and no-one here needs to be 'shamed'.

James said...
I saw your passport pic.
Your mum's hot.
Oh and i concur, you're the herpes girl. Even if you're not, you are.

In summation: You're mother is hot, and you have a cold sore on your upper-lip that u can make disappear by holding an invisible square over.

I really think I've been looking at the wrong girl on that website. Who is the invisible square lady and should I be concerned about her dopplegangy qualities? I'm hungry.

Anonymous said...
Lindsay McDougall's a legend. Are you excited to work with the great Frenzal F*ckwit?

Lindsay is wonderful, and ever since you left this comment I have very much enjoyed referring to him as the great Frenzal Fuckwit. I also call him, at various times, Party Scraps, Tiny Pockets, and my elephant-tit-thalidomide-dancing pal. We are kicking friendship goals.

Bomba said...
Have you heard about the Wren jnr family feud?
http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2007/12/26/1198345081498.html
Grandad was right about John Snr being a scurrilous prick, but the current generation take the buttered confection for being totally unprincipled low-lives. Talk about invasion of the body snatchers! Rat cunning bastardry may run in the blood but this type of evil-doing takes real work. The whole nature/nurture thing raises its contentious head. I suspect some bile got mixed in with mothers milk.

Yes, I did read that article. I'm not overly keen on carrying on the family feud through future generations, though I have met the youngest Wrens as they are both actors and the mood was somewhat tense to say the least. It's hard to shake bad blood sometimes.

N-Lo said...
It seems that moving to Sydney is all the rage at the moment, not a week goes by that I don't discover another friend or acquaintance is heading north (or south or even east as the case may be). I look forward to reading of your adventures to help ease my trepidation about my likely move later this year. The things we do for love/money! Fingers crossed those new liquor laws come in.

Anyhoo, my question: Is it hard to always be so nice to everyone?
Do you really like so many random strangers (and stalkers) coming up for a chat?
and
Can you tell me how best to approach someone that you have met before a few times, perhaps not for a while and only fleetingly, when it is clear they have no recollection of who you are?

Hello, N-Lo.


a) It's not hard to be nice to people if they come up and say hello, though to be honest there's not that many folk who bother charging up and poking me in the chest and saying UR BLOG SUX LOL as they prefer to do that under the cloak of darkness. If someone does bother to share public greetings and shyly admit to having an amusing commenter pseudonym I tend to get a bit overexcited and clutch at their arm as it's so nice putting faces to names sometimes, isn't it?




b) Go easy on them, and be sure to reintroduce yourself so they don't have to spend five minutes staring at you and nodding and pretending to know you as they frantically flip through the filofax in their mind and praying to god they haven't slept with you. We each have massive memory gaps, particularly the problem drinkers among us.

nosey but nicely said...
Hi Fits,
It seems you are madly in love, the real deal and congratulations to you for that...it's incredibly nosey but I ask for I am in a similar situation. When will you or will you divorce husband number one. Do you want to marry again....does it matter to you whether you do?

I am still married and incredibly close to my ex but wonder how long that tie should bind.....

you don't have to answer this obvs

We're getting divorced this year, and both very happy to be doing so. Years past there was talk of staying married forever as a rather sentimental nod to our partnership, but with new companions and passing time we both feel it's best to put it to bed. We remain obscenely close and in constant contact.


With regard to your ex, sometimes in these situations it's better to close the door on a marriage as no matter how close you are, a divorce may be a significant gesture in allowing both parties to move on. Completely up to you, though.



I'm not overly concerned about getting married again. Three times is possibly enough for one lifetime, wouldn't you say? We shall see.

tom's thumb said...
reading the Q & A from last time....i almost gagged when I read your response to a request to 'steal your Q&A idea'...

nothin new under the sun dear fits....and to imply that a whole two other people out of the billion's of users of this here web thingy have already 'stolen' a REALLY old idea is....well

precocious

I believe the response was particularly tongue in cheek, tom's thumb. I'm well aware that others have been asking and answering questions since before the dawn of time, and simply chose two examples I found comedic. If you require me to explain any other lighthearted quippery on this site feel free to ask.

A nonny mouse said...
In reference to the glabrous inhabitants of Sydney...

I tried on a t-shirt in Newtown on a recent visit and it had a Grand Canyonesque V neck. (They don't sell such cutting edge garments in Canberra you know.)

Anyway, I am of Mediterranean descent. Which is not to say I have rolled down Mt Vesuvius, but that I have a reasonable chest rug for a man, especially about the bosom.

I have absolutely no interest in burning, donating to charity, shaving or waxing my chest hair.

Is it acceptable for me to wear one of these strange t-shirts: chest hair gently waving in the shimmering haze of summer, skin perhaps glistening slightly in the awkward heat, sans large gold crucifix?

I can't imagine that I would look anything but a capricious fool.

I remain as ever.

Oh, please allow your hirsute self to roam free. One shouldn't be hindered by perceived bodily flaws, particularly when it's something as manly and downright butch as a hairy chest. Don that V and watch the bitches swoon, my swarthy chum.

Romeo Montague said...
Hi there, Ms Fits. What do you think of this?

Would you read more?

'The requested URL was not found on this server. Please visit the Blogger homepage or the Blogger Knowledge Base for further assistance.'



*dies of curiosity*

Siouxsie said...
Ms Fits, You saved me.

Last week I was stuck on the flight from hell (more like TO hell, Melbourne to Brisbane).
Worst seat on the plane (back row, Aisle).
Most turbulent flight I have ever experienced.
Crying children ALL around me. Was actually kicked in the neck by one while their parents were holding them in the line for the toilet.

BUT, you made it all okay.
Reading your Frankie article on bad pick up lines actually caused me to laugh out loud ('You smell wet. Let's party.').
Then quickly look around because I was listening to my mp3 and most likely sounded like a special needs child.
But it was all okay, the elderly and young children didn't mind.
Keep it up, Lady.
Because, what would we do without you?

It's a pleasure to amuse folk who cop body blows from screeching children*, Siouxsie. I live to give, of course.







*at first read I thought that you'd kicked a child in the neck rather than the other way around, and wasn't quite sure if I should be encouraging such reckless behaviour. Thank goodness you're simply imitating retarded people instead.

Night Owl said...
Hi, long time reader first time poster. OK thats a lie, I only just discovered this blog.. but welcome to Sydanee all the same.

Good call on "Oscillate Wildly" fox drink water.. it's a ripper. Just be prepared to wait 3 months to get a reservation... worth it though.

Also worthwhile checking out "A'Mews" in Glebe, and my favourite-ist place ever, "Wet Paint Cafe" in Coogee.

Probably not your area of expertise... but is it wrong to be distrustful of men who choose to piss in a cubicle when there is urinal space available? I can't help but think they're hiding something.

They may well be, Night Owl. If you're visiting the sort of venues I frequent, they're most likely hoovering a-grade goozle up their nostrils and to hell with the consequences/queue. Do try not to bang on the door too abruptly; they're probably in the midst of a most private moment.

Romeo Montague said...
Um, sorry, had some issues, and had to take that down.

So, at the risk of repeating myself...

Ms. Fits, what do you think of this?

Would you read more?

I think it's gorgeous, and yes. Not least because I'd give my right arm to go to school with (and break the heart of, you cad) someone named Cherrie Blossom. More folk should be sharing their tales of love on the interwebs. There's an anonymous blog out there in the sphere just waiting for me to confess my sins.

A. Nonymous Esq. said...
O wise Fitsy,

Just found out my family know about my blog. Which contains much swearing, some wishful thinking, numerous references to hangovers and possibly a whinge somewhere in the archives about herds of FWDs of cute doggie photos from an aunt.

What ever will I do?

What a sad moment for you, A.Nonymous Esq. I was unaware that my parents read my blog (or indeed, listened to my radio show on Triple R) until a few sly comments about perhaps overly personal revelations alerted me to their inner knowledge and I experienced a mild state of panic.


Obviously it's difficult at first knowing that family members are reading your relatively low-key mind meanderings, but you really should continue to expel your thoughts regardless of who may be reading. I've had many moments of considering others browsing this blog and censoring certain things accordingly...in the end you must simply say what you want to say and own it and whoever decides to deride you for it may stick it in their pie-hole. Your family must accept this, and all of the wonderful parts of you and your brain.



Goodness, I'm sounding obscenely Hillsong. A grand time to finish up. Leave your deeply probing questions for next time in the comments below, and if anyone sees Hamish Blake loitering around TELL HIM I'M COMING FOR HIM.

53 comments.