Reasons you will hate me

Joel is a quality example of the substandard males overrunning my homestate. To any young Adelaidian women who haven't yet taken the gamble, move interstate and improve your prospects!

At least he's out of your hair for a few months, young lady. You should count yourself lucky that you're free of his WILDLY INVENTIVE HUMOURINGS for the time being.

You hate him just because his Dad is a liberal politician.

You are such a bitch. and not in a good way.

No, I hate him because he's a Young Liberal and they are by nature appalling human beings.

'ready to be with the best mare'

... watch out Hillary Swank ...

By your own admittance, you don't know any Young Liberals.

How can you hate them if you don't know them?

For all you preach tolerance and peace, YOU are by nature an appalling human being: intolerant, judgmental, hopelessly biased. Actually, make that just hopeless.

In other news: you are ugly.

I certainly do know them. I just choose not to befriend them as they tend to harsh my mellow.


The fact that I am ugly is hardly news. Although it might make for a point of discussion on The Catch-Up.

Well Anon, at least Ms Fits can't be referred to as gutless and spend her time hiding behind a non descript title,
you pussy.

Oh dear god no - Joe Scalzi's son?! Scalzi was SA Libs' No 1 god-bothering, 'family values' (read, anti-gay) crusader until mercifully he was annihilated at least year's election.

The apple's obviously gonna be a charmer too :-/

Do you KNOW Joel?

You don't have to personally KNOW someone to dislike them. I don't KNOW that guy on my tram who has Avril Lavigne blasting out of his earphones every morning, but that doesn't mean I can't dislike him.

Anyone who would describe themselves as a 'stallion' is worthy or derision.

Anon, the term you are looking for is admission. Unless you you are saying that Fits, by her own "right to enter" doesn't know any Young Liberals? Or is it that Fits, by the "inverse/reciprocal of the impedence of a circuit" doesn't know any young Liberals. Neither make that much sense but at least the latter sounds a bit like an oath one might swear to never associate with YL's. Perhaps I'm being harsh, it might be that you are using Google translate to render your tremendous insights from the original Portugese.

And that ladies and gentleman is why I do not watch Big Brother. Try it, life is fantastic!

- not the Young Liberal Anon

P.S. Fits: you perty.

Adelaide has a lot to answer for in the past 5 years.

When I visited the city about ten years ago, after driving straight down from Woomera without the obligatory Barossa Valley stopover, the only thing I found was a half-decent Irish Pub.

No really, that little pub was THE ONLY THING IN THE WHOLE CITY worth stopping to look at.

Of course, John Howard may have been watching the Australian cricket team play an all-time classic match just a hundred yards from that pub, but even so I do not resile in any way from the point I have just made.

Adelaide SUX and any intelligent Adelaidean will surely agree with me.

I’m an Adelaidean wots got smarts … and, unfortunately, I must concur. Especially after spending years in London and Tokyo – there isn’t a decent sushi butty to be found anywhere in this town!

A mormon, some other xian, another babyfaced xian mysoginist waiting to be voted in (vote for Cruz!!1!!!), and the Young Lib son of a former MP:

You know Endemol Southern Cross is taking sweet give-'em-enough-rope revenge here? They are true evil geniuses and I applaud them.

And the best the Young Liberals (a counter-intuitive phrase if ever there was one, like “tasty douche-bag” or “interesting reality television”) can come up with is “you’re ugly” and “bitch”. They confirm my old theory from student politics: the Tory boys desperately want to fuck the lefty girls*, never get the chance, and end up lashing out. They are used to rejection by apolitical girls, but the lefty girls reject ’em for who they are and what they believe, which leaves much deeper scars.

* Or one who has a funny hair-cut, or piercings, or 15 hole Doc boots etc etc. Basically any woman who is not a mousey blonde called Sophie who is doing Commerce but really wants to get into Marketing or HR after she graduates.

Ooh, he is vile, isn't he? In fact, the only truly decent guy seems to be the "nerdy" one. The firey and the capitalist (I know) seem ok but all the others are complete knobs.

Guys like Joel are the reason I give Chapel St a wide berth on a Saturday night.

*shudder*

I'm hot for the Mormon chick, though.

(See what I did there?)

No, no, don't get up. I'll show myself out.

Nobody wants to catch gonorrhoea, AIDS, stupidity or communism by sleeping with some fucked up Marieke Hardy type who cuts herself at night and pretends she's depressed because of the state of the world.

How do they want to catch gonorrhoea, AIDS, stupidity or communism then, beamer? Surely it's my way or the highway.

Tee hee, Beamer, I love it when Ms Fits' fans pretend to diss her, but make it obvious that they're being ironic with gentle little touches like misspelling "gonorrhea" at the same time as accusing someone of being stupid.

Sigh.

You witty folk make me swoon.

Dear Beamer. We have some issues don't we. Sex = disease = violence = death. You and the Mufti should form a discussion group.

OH. MY. GOD! I think I just found my next ex-husband!

Time for me to stop looking.

*insert sarcasm footnote here*

I knew a Young Liberal once.

I wonder where he is now.

I really think the nerd guy (Jamie) is hot.

Nerds roXor

ScallyFAG (see what I did there?) can't spell.

joel - im glad hes in the house and not walking down rundle mall towards the stag

adelaide - i actually quite like it

gonorreah - if i was gonna catch it from anyone....*wink*

anonymouses - tis easy to hide behind and unlinkable name

bb - cruz needs to be voted in so we can hear more about his self professed chauvanistic ways "chicks fight for equal rights, when they're just not ready to handle them"

young liberals - i knew one once too. made me very angry. especially when she roped my brother into handing out how to vote cards. oh, how i yelled that day

spelling - whatevs

oh! and nerdy jamie, i like him

let's not forget that young labor people are knobs, too.

I went to high school with him and lived a kilometre from him. (Future pick up line?) He seemed very meek at the time but he was quite a few years below me.

Anyway, what is it with people who go to private schools and get tattoos which incorporate the school motto: the IHS on his back was part of the St Ignatius crest, yet I am pretty sure that the Jesuits won't be claiming him as their own just yet. Maybe if he wins.

I once saw his father cadging votes on election day...at a funeral. It is amazing what being Italian in an electorate full of them can do.

Note: I am Italian and my mum is a Labor minister.

When I was in Young Labor I once participated in a mock parliament in the real parliament on a week night. I caught the bus there and on the way got off and got completely stoned before heading to the event with my bogan friend. My contribution was a very theatrical, "Here, here," or should that be "Hear, hear," when someone who was taking it seriously made a speech.

I guess that makes me a knob.

Your old pal, Alf.

I have to admit I've not spent any time in Adelaide but am a little curious as to why the city of churches so polarises opinion. Aside from the whole Snowtown bodies/barrels/slaughtering thing. And Port Power, if I thought it was just those misshapen fuckers & their mulleted supporters I'd nuke the place. But I was brought up to never stereotype so I won't think that.

But stereotyping is the way of the future, epon. Join me and my narrow-minded brothers in our hasty judging.

Ms Fits... when you were young, did you imagine that you would one day be a pop-culture leftie with the intellectual gravitas of a grapefruit?

Fits, okay, I'll join but we'll clearly have to narrow the gauge of this little soul-train. Anon, your alliteration leaves a little to be desired but at least you've found yourself a dictionary & a half a wit; well played.

Please, don't just pick on young Liberals.
ALL Liberals are cunts. Especially the old ones.

I feel I must defend Adelaide here. It's a small city with a "big country town" lifestyle. Initial impressions do sometimes disappoint, as it's not immediately obvious as to some of the benefits of this place. I feel one needs to spend some time here before it becomes obvious that it's really rather pleasant.

I travel to Melbourne quite frequently, and also lived there for a couple of years. A wonderful, vibrant and active city which I enjoy very much. I cannot, however, afford to live in that city and have the lifestyle that I (and my family) enjoy.

And whenever we feel we need a short burst of fun, Melbourne is an easy days drive or a 1.4 hour flight away.

Don't be too quick to judge the place. It's not all mullets and V8 racing cars ;-)

Sorry Matthew, but I've just been invited to join the (very popular) hasty-judging group so I am unable to show mercy & therefore must imagine you look like a v8 racing car with a mullet.

p.s. veri-baby was dupsbhit: how did they know???

The three words he used to describe himself are remarkably apt - he certainly is extremely and.

Who IS the best mare at a Young Liberal function? I imagine there would be so many mares to choose from...

BTW, is it true you can actually catch communism from sleeping with someone? The only thing I ever caught from sex was bird flu.

Now let us be honest for a minute: we have conclusively proven that Joel is absolutely correct when he says he can't help making people laugh.

In other news, fucked-up Marieke Hardy types make the world go round.

The guys is a "fucktard", and "fucktards are fair game!

I'm rather chuffed right now that I was first up with a homestate deprecating comment. I am not surprised because A-town tends to be the number one state when it comes to self deprecation.
That said, I have a feeling most Adelaidians/Adelaideans secretly believe the city of churches, the one city that goes all the way, is possibly the best place on earth. It's ripe with fat grapes, abundant with fresh produce, and statistically rich with single men (which is a sometime temporary boon if not a lifelong decision).
I'm quite content in Sydney for the time being, but I'd be lost if I didn't know two iconic silver balls marked the path home, or that a nine dollar litre carafe of rose at the Exeter was in ready access, there to drown out the 'pithy' humour of priests.

It is not where Joel is from that makes him a wanker - it is that stuff Ms Fits wrote. I have lived in Adelaide, and also in Melbourne, Sydney, and Paris among others. Adelaide is a place like any other. If you are not having a good time somewhere it is not the place - it is you. Get over it.

The stallion thing is pretty funny. I wonder if he's heard of gelding? Tends to focus the mind, horse trainers tell me.

Fitzy darling, even though you lose me around this time every year with your inexplicable attachment to Big Brother, I always love you for the fact that you only have to mention "Liberals" and your blog enters some form of toxic prolixity thanks to the angry – and deliciously inarticulate – anon posters.

PS. I think you're a bitch in the very best way and I'd catch communism from you in a heartbeat.

katie, im sorry to be the one to tell you this, but they've taken the balls away.
its only temporary, while they have them 'professionally cleaned' (wipe the emo off of them), but its very strange in the mall without them.
in the interim they have erected* a box** with a picture of the balls*** on it

*hehe
**hehehe
***hehehehehehe

borderline?

Why do I suddenly have the urge to take this guy boating?

Ha! Katie/Lady Symon! Fancy meeting you here!

You are so right - the $9 'rafs at the Ex *are* the best part about Adelaide.

Other points about Adelaide that make it quite decent:

Ky Chow
the Central Markets - one million times better than the Queen Vic Markets. Fact.
20 minutes to the hills, 20 minutes to the sea
Essentially, only three places to choose from when it comes to going out so decision making is never a problem
Previously mentioned exeter 'rafs (even though manager Kevin is a misogynistic twat)

On Joel - if you look carefully, he's actually balding very rapidly on top which gives me quite the warm feeling in my tummy. He also *may* have cerebal palsy. NOT SURE.