Reasons you will hate me

get real - as long as there is titty, drunken simulated sex and a punch on - BB5 will have delivered - sounds like me last saturday night

Are you going to hate yourself for not being able to peel your eyes away from the vapid whores and wankers?? I know I am.

I liked it when they had been in the house for ten minutes and they were already discussing who was "playing the game." How do you know? You've only just said hello to them.

Oh, I will be duly glued. And praying for handjobs.

I can't do it. I can't bring myself to watch it. I know it should be like reading Miranda Devine – a chance to get some good hatred and loathing worked up. But I still can't bring myself to do it.

i dunno, like, i kinda like christie's manurisms.

*chokes on words*

For me it is like slowing down at a car accident. You know you shouldn't but you're curious what all the fuss is about. Except unlike a car accident, I hope most of the Big Brother people are hurt.

I watched it last night, well part of it. Thought 'would be good if they had an urban leftie who didn't refer to themselves in the third person' (wtf 'hotdog').
Then, in an Orson Wells Big Brother moment, they introduce an urban leftie 'journalist'. Hopefully he isn't edited to look like a twat, and stays long enough convince the rural guy to sexually assault the sydney 'tight-marcs-shirt' poser.

Noticed that they are all pretty retarded?

"Sales Rep", "Receptionist", etc.

*resigns from sales rep\receptionist job in typical fit of retarded pique*

But what about Gretel!? She was wonderful last night!

Talk more about Gretel! What is the best thing she has ever said/done?

*tumbleweeds roll by*

Oh very WELL, I'll begin, bloody.

How about the time when Johnnie was evicted from series 1 and Gretel told him, when he got on the stage, "Now, stop that moronic honking."

And how about the time when she dealt with Merlin's protest in a way that I KNOW Ms Fits does not think was any good but I think preserved the dignity of both parties?

And how about the time when she tore Ben from series 3 to shreds?

And so forth.

Fop, your devotion to Gretel is inspiring. Today you have launched a one man attack on the Gretel-loathing blogosphere and if passion is anything to go by, I suspect everyone will be converted shortly.

Hypothetical: What if Gretel announced that she hated Steps AND Aqua?

Are you TEASING/MOCKING me, Miz Culture?

ANd does she LOOK like the sort of woman who wouldn't enjoy frantically frugging around her lounge with Saxon and the kids to the strains of "Last Thing On My Mind"?

Would I ever tease or mock you, spunk rat?

Oh my god.

I'm in a bad place.

I just visualised Gretel dressed up as a cowgirl in chaps and all, dancing and singing "My bootscooting baby is DRIIIIVING me ker-razy..." while Saxon sits on the bed (mates optional) having a tug.

Therapy. Need it. So bad.

That is so dirty it's fantastic.

You know Jess, you're responsible for my turning on the TV and watching big brother for the first time tonight.

Oh. My. God. Are they always this vapid?

Welcome aboard the Hell train, Lefty. You're going to love it and want to die all at the same time x

Oh the horror. So inane yet so strangely compelling. Twins with one brain between them. I can't look away.

...In the living room, the HMs are talking about books. Christie says she remembers reading "How to Kill a Mocking Bird" in high school. Michael mentions "1984" by George Orwell but Christie has never heard of him. Michael explains that the concept of BB is actually inspired by George Orwell's book...

What does it say about the people who read this blog that a heartfelt Mother's Day Blog only elicits 4 responses, but a blog about Big Brother elicits 17 responses?

Ah, the latte left, as banal and as insipid as the right.

On the subject of what has Gretel done lately, has anybody caught up with the Archibalds yet? Well to cut a long story short, there is a so-so portrait of her hanging and whilst I was there these two older(I mean really old) gentlemen started quizzing each other over who was this Gretel & what was she famous for? poor Gretel

I am so fucking sick of people saying 'latte left'. The left are broader in policy and population than one drink. I drink a long macchiato with a twist of lemon, and i have friends who drink across the whole spectrum of coffee:milk:water ratios. Even a few who drink tea!

Banal, insipid? Too simplistic anon. But thanks for the courage to say them here. A lesser person wouldn't have used there real name.

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"What does it say about the people who read this blog that a heartfelt Mother's Day Blog only elicits 4 responses, but a blog about Big Brother elicits 17 responses?"

How about, blogs are a good forum to discuss cultural ephemera like a man called Hotdogs not knowing where Tasmania is on a map, but a shit one to discuss our relationship with our mothers? Or perhaps it says that a number of comments on a post is a precise measure of exactly nothing?

"Ah, the latte left, as banal and as insipid as the right."

Nice! Better go and tell them just that... in a blog comment! Then email your friends and tell them how you told them - man you pegged those lefties.

(pls delete my cut and paste abortion above)

i feel your pain.
you are not alone.

It's times like this that I am glad my TV is broken.

Let me know if anything interesting happens.

I should also have said that the latte left is unable to read properly. Please note I said:

Ah, the latte left, as banal and as insipid as the right.

Notice the use of the word right. You see I don't dislike the left, in fact i am proud when i get called a leftie , commie, annarchist etc. I only dislike the latte left. Like I dislike, no, hate the right.

What do I mean by the latte left? Those people who claim to love multiculturalism, yet choose to live in a middle class predominantly Anglo suburb because they "feel safer" or "fit in better" and because it means they can get a good latte. People who claim to support unionism, but aren't active in their union, or aren't even a member of a union. People who claim to be environmentalists, but own a car. People who claim to be pro-refugee, but vote for the ALP because they know if they win office it won't affect their hip pocket and their ability to buy chardonay. The latte left, people who talk the talk, but don't walk the walk.

How lovely, Ms "Anonymous", that you deem every commenter on this blog to fit your description of "latte left" because everyone who comes here must be EXACTLY THE SAME.

The conversations are so deathly dull and phenomenally stupid. Watching BB05 is like being stuck at the hairdressers - or worse, at the dentist, where the 15-y-o dental 'nurse' regales you with anectodes while you have a mouth full of cotton swabs.

Anonymous, I'm curious as to how your draw your link between every BB Viewer out there being Latte Left.

Regards
-- BanalAndInsipid

Oh, and if there are that many of us are out there, I'm wondering why the ALP aren't in government?

I dunno about the latte left ... I prefer to have a Carlton Draught (or 7), followed by some vodka & cokes !

No doubt Anon will deride me for not drinking VB ;P

BB, as always, is eerily fascinating precisely because they all seem so vapid. Except for Tim, who is a Newtown journo 'latte leftie wanker' if I ever saw one. God love 'em ! :)

I actually auditioned for BB05 ... and considering my girlfriend looks kinda like a cuter Gianna / Gianna looks kinda like a less attractive version of my girlfriend (pick whichever comparison YOU find less morally offensive), fidelity could have been a somewhat difficult concept to keep a hold of had I been locked in that house with the rest of 'em for any lenght of time !

I actually think Kate is the most attractive gal there.

But I don't bother watching anymore. BB's "surprises" weren't actually that surprising, and personality wise, they all seem to be carbon copies of one another.

-- BanalAndInsipid