Taking_notes
Ms Fits is an irritatingly smug 32 year-old television writer who yearns to be Bob Ellis but will settle for Bob Hart. At least he gets free meals. Pompous nobjockey.

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Inventive

TUE26FEB

"Sometimes it was a bit of a bore. Especially when the children were little."










Comin atcha, live for double-shot Tuesdays so long as there are no pressing afternoon games of golf/liquid lunches to be indulged in please welcome Canberra's answer to Kyle and Jackie O, Monsieur and Madame Downer.





'The couple began timidly - and their repartee came across rather stilted - but Mr Downer warmed to the task and eventually hit his stride when he began discussing the US presidential race and pet health insurance.'




Well, who wouldn't open up the floodgates of conversational gold when discussing ulcer medicine for Tiddles and accompanying costs? I can't think of anything nicer than listening to Alexander Downer waxing lyrical on premiums for pooches except for perhaps BEING REAMED BY THE CORPSE OF RODNEY DANGERFIELD TO THE SOUNDTRACK OF JOHN FARNHAM'S WHISPERING JACK.







'Mrs Downer copped a curly question from "Diana from Glenelg", who wanted to know how she had managed to keep her marriage "fresh" when her husband was so often away.

"Sometimes it was a bit of a bore. Especially when the children were little," Mrs Downer replied.

"But subsequently the time apart allowed me the opportunity to grow as a person, and do my own thing. (I'm) able to sleep in the bed without his snoring."'




Don't think about the Downer's marital bed. Don't think about the Downer's marital bed. Don't think about the Downer's marital bed.










'When discussing how hearing loss affected relationships, Mrs Downer again sank the boot into her husband, saying he chose not to hear her when she asked him to mow the lawns or put out the rubbish.

"There is a lot of lack of hearing in our house," Mrs Downer said.'







Now that I simply can't imagine at all....




















































p.s. That's right, I'm threatened because he's encroaching on my turf. So I lash out when caged, so what. Fuck you.

28 comments.

Comments

26Feb11:56
Ms Wright said...
When I saw this on the news I thought to myself "I bet Fits has fun with this one".


...and fuck you too
26Feb11:59
sublime-ation said...
Can radio DJs have battles, a la hip hop DJs/MCs?

DUB WAR WITH DOWNER, FITS. I'll slay Abbott on the dance floor.
26Feb12:16
EclecticEccentric said...
Fits, I don't think I would feel threatened by The Exciting Downers' All Singing, All Dancing Radio Show. Not even if they introduced a Gardening Spot (G-Spot? Don't visualise, don't visualise ...)
26Feb12:17
betty slocombe said...
I particularly like that the name of the cafe in the photo seems to be 'Kismet'; which history buffs will know is in fact what Lord Nelson said as he lay dying, rather than 'Kiss me', to Hardy: Hardy may or may not have replied 'fuck you'.
As we know those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
26Feb12:47
Kaleu Big said...
Mrs Downer again sank the boot into her husband, saying he chose not to hear her when she asked him take those handcuffs off and remove the gimp mask
.
Let us enjoy the Downer months

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrFbtckAFyA


26Feb12:47
exordium said...
who wouldn't want a piece of witty duo coming atcha aurally and rergularly.. mmm
26Feb12:53
itsfuntoflirtatpiedimontes said...
The restaurant is called Verve, and despite being described as "swanky" in one article, I can attest to its mediocre canberraness. Recently, I ate there and had a piece of swordfish for 35 bucks that was small, lukewarm and uninspiring, much like Alexei's contribution to Australian politics.
26Feb13:28
Lala said...

That's right Lady Fits, you and the boys best be watching your backs. The Downers are definitely gunning for the youth market with that kind of talk.
Marital bed? The horror, the horror.
26Feb15:11
squib said...
I hate to sound like a Today Tonight story but swordfish has incredibly high levels of mercury. Of course it's alright to eat it once a year
26Feb15:17
Anonymous said...
so who's looking after his store (mayo) then?

hmmm .... member for mayo ....um, why does that make me shudder after reading the above comments about his marital bed? yuk.
26Feb15:43
Mel said...
HEY! I will not have you insulting Whispering Jack! Feel free to lay the boot into Age of Reason, though.
26Feb16:03
The Punisher said...
I am so opening up a Garden Centre called the G Spot.

Cervix with a smile.
26Feb16:12
Me saying said...
Thank-you and very much, Fuck you too!
26Feb16:54
Andy Pants said...
You should do a segment on triple J in which you ring Ms Downer and ask her an inane question.
26Feb16:58
Fi said...
Be afraid- Robbie, Downer and the Doctor...
26Feb17:50
shanel said...
Mrs Downer again sank the boot into her husband, saying he chose not to hear her when she asked him take those handcuffs off and remove the gimp mask.

Although she's happy to leave on the orange jump suit. That's his special favourite.
26Feb21:41
broken left leg said...
I think the Downers will revolutionise radio.

I can picture people turning to 5AA for the ads and then changing stations again when the DJ starts rabbiting on.

He's a commercial genius.
26Feb21:57
strawbs said...
If i was a pollie, i could go for free lunches(tax payed) get my head on radio(got a great 1 for that) then talk about marital bed's.
could do a better job while i was walking the dog!
26Feb23:44
chips said...
Talk of the Downer boudoir is essentially an aural contraceptive.
27Feb00:53
shula said...
Thinking.....

About the Downer's marital bed.....

...

AAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!
27Feb05:06
Ben said...
Bald-faced plug:

http://newmatilda.com/2008/02/26/cardboard-solution
27Feb08:57
Rose said...
Lack of hearing, can't imagine that + pic = gold
27Feb11:04
Richard said...
"ON THE weekend that Peter Costello became the man who would never be PM, his son Seb caused his own sensation.

The chipper and quick-witted 20-year-old host of Echuca's Classic Rock FM breakfast show was handcuffed and locked in a sheep cage in a typical FM radio dare after decrying the 84-minute jail sentence of LA-LA Land party girl Lindsay Lohan."

Product of marital bed radio role play fun?

http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/son-of-a-gun-isnt-sheepish-at-all/2007/11/25/1195975868033.html
27Feb11:43
Ally-oop said...
Hey Ms Fits, off-topic but I'll give it a go - was checking out Clem Bastow's now defunct blog and I was wondering if Dream Dresses was still going - I have a few dresses I don't need anymore and would like to give them to something worthwhile.
27Feb11:53
la nadine said...
i say don't fight it, embrace it.

"fits and the downer for breakfast."

has a nice ring to it, don't you think?
27Feb12:15
lou said...
Nine men and one woman on the steering committee for the ideas summit??? I thinks it's time for a piece-of-Ms. Fits'-mind phone call to K-Rudd's office: cans of whoop-ass need to be unleashed.
27Feb17:27
Dr Nic said...
I can't get over how petulant he looks every time you see him with his arms folded!
11Mar00:10
forthosethatcameinlate said...

There was (lively, opinionated, deranged, irrelevant, feisty) debate in my (sad, culture vulture arts consumer regional disenfranchised spellcheck please pea brain and rather noisy) mind regarding the relative merits of you (lovely) and the divine Ms Judith Lucy.

This is a GreAt ComPliment worthy of MUch RanDom CapitaliZZZZsation.

Thank you.

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