Thar she bleeds.
Thanks to my friend Dave The Scot for changing the tone of my morning muesli with this:
'I am female. I am not girly. I am desperately ungirly. I look good in pink, but I feel guilty about it. For various reasons, I would sooner belly-crawl through broken glass than buy anything marketed “for girls!” or “for women!” And I resent the fact that feminine products have me, as it were, by the short hairs in this regard.
And so, a year or so ago, I decided that I wanted a new brand of tampon. Something that was not girly, that was not pastel, that did not have flowers, and which did not make my ovaries curl up and die of shame. I do not mind having a period–I’d rather not, but eh, goes with the territory–but I detest the marketing. t’s time for a rugged new brand. A brand no one will ever call “girly.” A brand you can take to the checkout counter and meet the clerk’s eye while you buy it, and if they say a word, you have ‘em tied to the mast and flogged.
Blackbeard the Pirate’s Rugged Tampons. A product you can trust, from a name you can’t!'
1. Yes, it really says 'comfortable plastic applicator won't keelhaul your nethers'.
2. I am utterly thrilled by this, and yet I'm not sure I want A MAN WITH A HOOK inserting things into my veedge.
3. Also in Blackbeard's range: Nair Wax Strips ('making body hair walk the plank since 1542'), FemFresh Hygiene Spray ('for even t' strongest o' wench odours'), and One-dose Diflucan ('Arrr...ease ye feminine discharge, ye itchy blaggards').
387 days til the next election.
Comments
davy jones' (vadge) (b)locker
*applauds*
clearly the title should have been
"Thar she flows!"
Sorry but the use of the words 'pluggin' and 'hole' still makes me feel as uncomfortable as hot pink marketing and ads with blue liquid do.
How good are they?
But i was thinking they should have used a female pirate a la elaines avatar from Pirates Rock My World.
Either that or she could have called them Red Beards, or is that just crass.
Finally something actually suggests what tampons are, you know, for! I was 27 before I discovered women didn't menstruate blue liquid!
Quite freaked me out at the time...
These are genius, I say. GENIUS.
Ninjas beat Pirates.
oh, dave.
Oops - http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/40022592/
Jesus Christmas - between scented/flavoured/MP3 tampons and this... it's a good thing I got a new WTF-ometer for my birthday!
I'm actually a huge fan of the ultra girly moxie tampons (http://www.moxie.com.au/).
there's enough ugly messiness around that time of the month, i want som prettiness.
AND they come in tins that won't disintegrate in your handbag/backpack/deskdraw like those horrid little cardboard boxes will.
Haha i bought those just for the little tins last week. I'm sure I can re-use the tins for.... something....
I think ladies will buy moxies once fot the tins, then go back to their noramal brands.
I am yet to try them out, I'm not sure how they'll stack up. But the tins are cute.
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