Reasons you will hate me

Poor Kim. I feel sorry for him... but not so sorry that I want to endure any more of John Howard.

So, I can't see what other choice we have than to ask him to go. It's not what we wanted, Kim, it's just the way it has to be. We feel just as bad about it as you do - no, worse. We wish it could have been some other way. But it can't.

Oh, it's heart-breaking.

I am very much excited about the 'dream team'.

I am worried that the bomber won't get your message, won't step down and they will just squabble about it until we lose the next one.

I also worry that people won't like Rudd (a valid concern because he is a cocky little bugger) and that everyone seems to be relying on this white knight to come along and save everyone. We don't even have a solid understanding of where we stand. Like bush says "if you don't stand for something, you don't stand for anything"

Fucking concerned that Bill Shorten will become the next leader.

Ms Fits/Mr Lefty/Underwhelming

I am concerned that with less than 12 months to go the "Dream Team" (have I heard that somewhere before?) won't have enough time to make significant in-roads into the juggernaut that is Howard's lies/meanness/general dickishness.

And then they'll be hung out to dry like another leader it appears we prefer not to mention these days.

Underwhelming: I'm more concerned that "if you don't stand for something, you FALL FOR ANYTHING".

Is that not what we've all watched KB do, with much dismay and yelling-at-the-television-news? Or is that just me?

Please to be putting that emailable thing on your blog miss so as lazy people like me can forward it to un-techy family without cutting and pasting.
It helps keep them sane.

Kim lost his moral authority when he sold out Labor values over Tampa. He's been a lame duck ever since.

Failing to defend, or even grasp the political significance of the Keating economic reforms has not helped his case for leadership either.

His main problem now is that he has lost the respect of his own supporter base, and as a result can't realistically expect to win votes from other segments of the community.

Rudd is not the answer

"It's time to go... Kimbo."

At which announcement, none of the housemates cried.

Not a big Beazley fan & also think Rudd would at least add a bit of professionalism to the media management side of campaigning - he does his homework. But I think that it's a mistake to make the Leader such a focal point; the obsession with finding the right leader to beat Howard isn't solving the problems with Labor's strategy, it's replicating them. Oppositions need to be a bit like a shark pack - gradually pick off the stragglers & weaker swimmers until you whittle down the mass around the centre. The opposition keeps going for the strongest in the middle, only getting the occasional bite and all the while getting hungrier and hungrier 'til they start to feed on each other.

kim has been dead in the water since tampa like timboy said. that's when he lost my respect and support, and he's never come back after it. sorry mrlefty, i have no sympathy for kim.

labor does need a leader who we can have some sort of faith in, to give us hope.

i'm feeling despondent about it all.

I just like the idea of Howard and Rudd facing off against each other...the two little fellers in glasses, squaring up with wee-sized pouts. ADORABLE AS PIE.

you're just making up blog posts now ms fits. i don't believe for a minute this phone call really took place. was funny though.

I'm afraid you don't know me well at all, Anon. It really, truly did. Also last night I called up Channel 9 and berated them for spelling Kim's name wrong.




Me: I mean, as if the poor bloke hasn't had it hard enough recently...he finally did something right and you lot spell his name wrong!


channel 9 newsroom lady: Yeah, we did too. Sorry about that.


Me: You just tell whoever that Liberal is in the edit room that I'm on to him or her.


channel 9 newsroom lady: Uh...okay.





SWEAR TO GOD.









I need a hobby.

meanwhile in a little state called NSW, another labour leader was bumbling along his merry way.

Can Iemmer stop frothing? and can someone get him some public-speaking lessons from Santa for Christmas!?

Labour has made we very worried over the past 2 weeks. I feel like a parent whose child is spinning out of control and all I can do is wring my hands dramatically.

I'd be more worried if I were on the side of the NSW Libs at the moment, Belgato. They were handed a card-carrying ALP disaster for Christmas and Debnam is in the process of completely fucking it up.


Lovely news, really.

Over the last 742 days your little countdown has gone from being a cheery thought to something rather ominous and urgent, hasn't it?

Kim is a pussy and in general reflects quite accurately the state of the Federal Labour party. They simply have no ticker!

As for Rudd, he's just another horrible little prick in a similar vein to Howard.

They deserve each other.

I think KB's a Liberal party mole.

Is anyone else nervous about the ALP using the phrase "dream ticket" when talking about anyone on their front bench?

On the ball, Timboy.

This is the era of the new left, we need a new leader. Kim just disgusts me nowdays. No fucken unity in the party.

JB for PM

'you've done it again' timboy...?

speaking of last night on the news, did anyone hear howard on nuclear power?

"the best weapon we have against climate change is nuclear power"

oops or uh-oh...?

John Brumby wouldn't cop nuclear power stations in Victoria.

But can he 'cop' a pair of rather fetching speedos, timboy?

The introduction of a swimsuit contest to election debates...

I'm all for it.

Brumby could work harder to soften his image a la dashing Ted.

I hope I'm not the only person who saw Ted 'The Chin' Baillieu emerging from the surf last night with a firm hand on his genitals. Truly stunning footage.

No

But the Sun ran a photo of Ted emerging triumphantly from the surf with wifey waiting loyally on the beach holding the towel Puberty Blues style.

looks like he's auditioning to be the next Harold Holt.

So he got Rove's name mixed up. Why was he asked about it in the first place? FFS shouldn't he be getting asked about policy and such things instead of passing on his condolences.

God, Howard can tell all manner of lies and things, but oh no KB siad Karl Rove instead of Rove Mcmanus, jeebus, focus people.

KB should have shuffled the benches though, what's the point of having members in the shadow cabinet who are not going to be there after the election, fucking idiot.

Totally agree its overblown, but unfortunately it goes to credibility - like when Bush says "put food on their families"

"fucking idiot" is a bit harsh. howard does it

Unfortunately, davethescot, KB volunteered his heartfelts at the doorstop on the day of Belinda Emmett's funeral - it was at the same time the funeral was starting, which is why he did it. Someone needs to give KB mnemonics coaching.

I see Hawkey's been creaming himself over Greg Combet of late...

Beazley should stay. He should do some radical housecleaning and change a few people and policies too. He should capitalise on the fact that there will def be a democrat president and the us will def cut and run in iraq. He should come out against the war, streamline our military. He should announce massive cuts to the navy and focus on small sas black helicopter counter terror strike teams in every capital city, that's the warfare of the future. He should also streamline the army and focus on having a medium size peacekeeping force that extremely well equipped and mobile. He could come out more strongly against liberal tertiary education changes and stop the runaway fee hikes. Fuck the student unions they never did a god damn thing for me. And when did I ever hear labor announce a strong mental health policy? millions of kids drugged and labelled add while public school infrastructure rots, a connection? They need to assure us of strong intelligence collection in order to heal the wounds of the wmd scandal. Fuck these stalwart cronies there is no fucking way I want Rudd, he's a god damn churchie people! He is for faith based initiatives, the guy is highly educated speaks chinese, but he gets up in the morning for god AND country. Gillard is some personality disorder feminist mess, I mean did you see Australian story, she hasn't had a boyfriend in over a decade! She's a power hungry wierdo and she doesn't belong. We need guys who are poor, smart and hungry...we need a huge injection of talent in all key areas. The missed opportunities with labor are just insane! the media turns up, and they say nothing reassuring to us at all. Come on the opposition in the us never stops bagging the war (and even the troops) are we such sycophants for our alliance? There is no way i'm voting for a churchie in 2007. No fuckin way i'd rather eat my own cock. Or some feminazi freak with nothin to say who hasn't been split since 94. Oh. My. God.

I need a hobby.

no use pretending, fits...

this IS your hobby.

AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG ABOUT THAT AT ALL.

Dr. Follicles is a fine establishment. As a former Los Angeles Pimp Daddy I can attest to their ability to snip a mean hunk of man hair. I felt like a spunk for a full 48 hours after getting my hair cut there.

That said... tits in the face are better but you don't get a free beer. One day they will open up a strip club salon combo and we will finally have a hair-undresser. Oh and my question is this... how do women (Ms. Fits) feel about men who shave their balls and pubes? Second Question (indulge me) If women can have multiple orgasms how do they know when to stop masturbating?

Dear Fits,

If it wasn't for the photos of your boobs (as lovely as they are), the swingers' night out, and one or two other small indiscretions gloriously recorded for all time on the internet, I'd insist YOU become a card-carrying politicist and give them a bit of hurry-up.

VOTE FITS!

THE VOTE FITS!

Ummm ... OK ... so I won't be your campaign manager but I WOULD shove one of your signs in my front garden.

And I mean that in the nicest possible way.

I was surprised that he didn't say what a tragedy it was that Graeme Thorpe was retiring (given the Ashes fever and all).

He's quite a jolly round chap and I'm sure he means well, but he's got about as much chance of beating off the evil little twat as I have. Come to think of it, I might actually have a better chance than he does, him having become a walking punch line and all. Or does the Labor party think that we might vote him in for some comic relief ? Wait, didn't they actually try that at the last election ?

I do believe the lovely kranki has mistakenly posted here rather than friday qtns.

So I will take upon myself a preliminary answer ('cos I just can't stop myself).

In terms of his final qtn, I will take it upon myself to quote from the Rolling Stones:

Don't stop
Don't stop
Baby don't stop
Baby don't stop
Honey Honey (don't stop)
Baby don't stop
Baby don't stop
Come on honey don't stop
Play on baby
Don't stop
Baby baby don't stop
Ah honey don't stop
Don't ya stop


And yes, I am happy to scream my own name. (Baby, honey don't stop!)

Err...whoever said hardy looks like myf warhurst is full of shit. Warhurst looks like she bought her teeth from the lolly shop, and has a voice like a half disected frog.

At least Kim could bring out some stinging books if he is outed.

Shit hot gig at Ding Dong on Friday 24th.

There will be a Ted pinata. Bring your own blinfold.

A selective retort to a rather long anonymous rant:

small sas black helicopter ... that's the warfare of the future
What are the guys gonna do? Blow up the suicide bombers ... again?

student unions they never did a god damn thing for me
Solid selfish policy. Guess you didn't eat the subsidised food, need to free/subsidised legal/medical/dental/day care service. Others do. Deal

Gillard ... hasn't had a boyfriend in over a decade!
Oh my. Burn her at the stake for not talking about recent boyfriends! Better than having sex with Janette Howard. Imagine a feminist, gosh what would they do? Possibly argue reproductive rights with the 'churchie'. At least he's a compassionate christian.

She's a power hungry wierdo and she doesn't belong. We need guys who are poor, smart and hungry
She's grew up poor, was a partner at a law firm and is 'hungry' (according to you). Sounds like all she's missing in your list is a cock. Sexist bastard. Insult her for something other than being female.
Other than that (and the fact you think Beazley should stay) fair spray.

""student unions they never did a god damn thing for me
Solid selfish policy. Guess you didn't eat the subsidised food, need to free/subsidised legal/medical/dental/day care service. Others do. Deal""

what fuckin union provides childcare you fuckin fool?

and what union provides dental? are you kidding me?

300 bucks a year saved is better than paying 300 bucks for 30 bucks worth of subsidised beer or some shit like that. Plus on rudd "At least he's a compassionate christian" at least, at least, at least come on for fucks sake for all we know the basis of that compassion is in a fear of burning in hell

and what's wrong with feminists and immigrants? nothing. There is only something wrong with them when they expect to be equal to the direct descendants of those men who civilised the entire country and world, who invented science, written language, bridges, the space race, those who fought for our freedom, there is definitely something shabby about coming in to a system at the eleventh hour and expecting/demanding total parity to those who are members of longstanding families who have contributed to the civilisation and culture/freedom you intend to profit and thrive on...if immigrants accept it is a privilege and women acknowledge it is a privilege to be all of a sudden in the space of 0.001% of human generations, just a couple of generations and men have to adapt to competing with 50% more of the population for jobs and positions, then females should show some fuckin respect for the fact that the young white men are the progeny of the fuckin fathers of this land and it is a slight to the forefathers to make like harder for their descendants. If you had have told Joe X going off to gallipoli that his great great grandson would have to bust his arse 24/7 to compete with singaporean feminazis to get a god damn job and some respect and dignity he would have told you to get fucked instead of risking his life and limb to make a better future for his progeny. Too many groups with newly acquired rights just strut around as if shit is their birthright when they just came in at the eleventh hour and secretly it pisses alot of god damn people right the fuck off. Immigrants who don't respect what's gone on here in 200 years to make a place with a free market in nissan silvias and mobile contracts, who don't respect the blood sweat and tears and families and bloodlines that made the world what it is deserve to fuckin die. So do white boys who become degenerates and don't improve on the previous generation. But most of all I hate feminists. God do I fuckin hate them, you fuckin militant, uppity cunts, you have no fuckin idea what and how we got where we are all you want is to be a man. Well you're not and take cock. "The independent woman of today is all about freedom, we're earning money....etc etc" you're cosmetic slaves and total sluts most of you, and most of you secretly would give it all up to be a kept woman after ten years of proving yourself as independent that would be quite enough for you...well say hi to IVF scum, because you're all infertile fucks and aging makeup caked dragons...Hahahaha and guess what cosmetics give you cancer and so does dying your hair....and fuckin die..please check us out on the web at www.ihatewomen.com for some more great talk ps there are only sluts and mothers...which one are you?

well somebody needs a hug.

hug me then bitch!

now now, Anon. Manners.

Sorry Hardy I shouldn't take it out on you I guess. Maybe its the roids! or maybe the gonzo porn. Yeah that's it too much Brandon Iron, and Kahn Tusion I think. Maybe I should go bat off. Anyway like your god damn blog post titles of late fuckin gold specifically "this racism is making me thirsty" great and "race that stops an asian" poetic, you may have a long career yet. Anyway three dollars a pound.

three dollars a pound?
mate, whatever you are smoking, move to metric and take it by the gram

It's a real worry when even Labor supporters start coming up with nicknames for their pretender to the Primie Ministership questioning whether he has, in the interim, become more suited to the role...

"Step down Kim Wrong Still!!!!"

omg its really long post