The lady doth protest.
So while the press have a field day seeing how many Beatles references they can cram into the Mills/McCartney marriage breakup (They Can't Work It Out, Got To Get You Out Of My Life, He's Going to Lose That Girl, Come Together (Apart), etc), the Heather Mills PR machine has gone into overdrive.
Your best one-stop-shop for Mills information is here, at the Heather Mills.org FACT/FICTION page, where Heather's sister somewhat bullishly tackles the lies and rumours about the ex Mrs. McCartney.
These range from the light-hearted:
'FICTION: "Heather makes Paul dye his hair"'
(NB: You will be pleased to note this is a VICIOUS UNTRUTH)
to the mystifyingly detailed:
'FICTION: "Croatia had little need for the limbs and aid Heather supplied to them"'.
Obviously the woman is receiving an absolute shellacking from the British press, and if she chooses to tackle particular 'gold-digger'/'master manipulator' stories in such a fashion she's welcome to. However, it's one thing to select a few choice headlines and offer redress (ie: 'Am not'/'He did it first'/'But I heart Stella's frocks' etc) and another to shine the spotlight on some rather intriguing denials:
'FICTION: "Heather has partied with and dated Arabs"'
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, NO.
Luckily this outrageous claim is hurriedly crash-tackled:
'FACT: "Heather married Alfie Karmal in 1989, his father was Arabic, his mother was Greek, making him half Arabic. She has dated men of many nationalities, English, Italian, Arabic, Slovenian and so on, hardly a crime! They range from poverty stricken to exceptionally rich and back again. To make a big deal of this is only laughable. Is she only allowed to date caucasian men from the UK of average income?!'
Hm. One might wonder why, if the preposterous notion of 'making a bit deal of this' is so 'laughable', it would need to be addressed at all.
This is what your mum means when she says 'just ignore them, darling. They are vicious cunts*.'
536 days til the next election.
*She is of course referring to the press/naysayers, and not Arabs. Are you calling my mother a racist? FUCK YOU.
Comments
FACT: some of heather's best friends are arabs.
FICTION(?): she keeps them locked in a closet in her basement and lets them out only for mealtimes and photo ops.
This is what your mum means when she says 'just ignore them, darling. They are vicious cunts*.'
Such good advice. So difficult to follow.
Meh.
for obscure reasons, i was tricked by reading your post into performing this mundance exercise and duly visited the site. I couldn't make sense of this: "FICTION: "Heather makes Paul go to the opening of an envelope"
(answer: "FACT: Paul: "Heather is also, according to some of these mischevious writers, supposed to encourage me to ‘go to the opening of an envelope’. Really ? Compared to many people we hardly go to anything unless it’s connected with our charity work. Again, anything we do attend is a joint decision." "
wtf???
you do realize i am at work now and i shouldn't be procrastinating doing such things....
It's tangential, but a Beatles nut friend and I once tried to out-list each other with porno titles drawing on Bateles song titles and/or lyrics; witness – Penny's Lane, Eleanor Rim Me, Now We Know How Many Cocks It Takes To Fill Up Albert's Hole, etc (there are sooo many more).
Of course the list was called I Saw A Film Today, Oh Boy
Tag.
r
ps. well i for one liked the legless bint, but she was no Linda.
I'm very sad that when I call a white coffee with one sugar a "Heather Mills" people will not know what I mean. Keep Heather famous!
How many limbs did Heather supply to Croatia? No wonder they had little need - there's only so many Croats that can share a leg.
maybe she sent the arabic limbs to croatia and the croation limbs ended up with arabs? can you imagine the outcry? grisly, I know! sigh.
I wish my mum said 'just ignore them, darling. They are vicious cunts*.'
My mum usually says something along the lines of, "you know darling, they're probably right. You do look hideous in that photo from your birthday party. I can see your nits. Make sure you delete it before you show anyone."
My mum says 'cunt' is a naughty word.
But, she did say she wants to fuck Paul McCartney, so I'm a little confused.
Who cares? Paul was the least attractive, most boring Beatle of the lot. And Wings sucked arse, except for Live and Let Die, because of it's James Bond associations.
Blergh. I was wondering aloud the other day about whether the Beatles sons should form a band. This was scuttled by the fact that Paul doesn't have any.
The - Q.what do you call a dog with wings? A. Linda McCartney - gag kind of lost its sparkle after her death.
that she was also hated by Paul's fans seems to have been forgotten. Dying young and tragically has been a great boost to her profile.
Dying young and tragically is the BEST way to improve one's profile.
Does your mum really say 'cunts'? My friend told my parents her uncle was a cunt on Sunday and they looked a little shocked. My mum's current one is 'pompous gits'.
My mother doesn't even like the word "crap" used let alone "cunt"!
Happy 30th for this Friday Ms Fits.
Just wanted to get in first.
Love BL
what galls me is the reason she is wanting out is he outshined her humanitarian efforts? Let's see, he was a Beatle, he has half a billion pounds, he tours, you have a charity that gets more free press and association than a dozen othes combined all BECAUSE of the association
please write ABC and protest her "Dancing with the Stars" appearance. We don't want to see her . She needs a show called 'Hangin' with the Hos"
http://abc.go.com/site/contactus.html
Heather is a whore and a gold digger. I won't watch her crappy show either. I think all these "rumors" are true. The slut has ruined her reputation and that's for good. Why is she on a show called Dancing with the Stars when she isn't a star?
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