Reasons you will hate me

Often when you marry quick,
you make that whole world slightly sick,
but if your husband has joined a cult,
wake up woman and freakin’ bolt.

If your husband seems quite insane,
The answer, lady, is far more plain,
Break the rules and get some booze,
Then grab an axe and line up Cruise.

I think it's time for Katey to get all xenuphobic on his arse (please explain).

In the birthing suite, no one can hear you scream.

can someone tell me what's happening with the hair in this photo?

We could tell you, Hell. But we'd have to kill you.



*sharpens knife*

*stares creepily*

Why would you do that?

You're just a..a .. jerk! You jerk!

$BDW$

I think it is just too late for her..she has been captured and reprogrammed.

i love how that post fitted *exactly* right in my screen, so i really didnt know who you were talking about till i scrolled

well done

and katie? i've had two kids. they will have to tape your mouth shut and remove your vocal chords. good luck

you are so right. And I reckon there's a touch of The Handmaid's Tale about it too, but with the sexes reversed.

They seem so happy!!!!
So very happy in that pseudo-christian religious kind of way.
Ms Fits are you jealous that you didn't get the chance to 'have his baby'?????

given that tommy shoots blanks (why Mimi Rogers left him, apart from being scared pooless at the then-nascent scientology bollocks) ...

*whose* baby is ms holmes actually having?

Pacey's.

Also, I'd like to commend Adam on his poem.

*commends*

There.

It's funny because in ten years, Tom's going to look just like Roman Polanski.

who's baby is it?

"I like to help others and count it as my greatest pleasure in life to see a person free himself of the shadows which darken his days." - L Ron Hubbard
Fear this spooky sauce-head with a stick:
http://www.suppressiveperson.org/images/hub-23.jpg

There goes the contents of my Ribena squeeze-box again ...

You guys are just jealous of his recent rise to Operating Cretin VII.

talk about your stockholm syndrome . ..

i reckon she's wearing a stap-on

belly, that is

and that either there will be a terrible tragedy in a few months, or she'll go through with the deception and "give birth" to a child, which might have a sheer scarf over its head

and bevis. why don't you make yourself a large glass of it? those tiny packs are just a couple of sculls-worth. then you'd have more to come through your nose when you snort

Tom Cruise has a dearth
Of sperm of any worth
But with Kate up the duff
He's actin all tough
But we know it's a virgin birth

or:
Tom has a skeleton in his cupboard:
The collected works of ol man Hubbard
Here's what Ron wrote
And verbatim I will quote
naa noo naaa noo blerch blerch MEEP

Then:
When Tom first touched Katie Holmes
Up went collective moans
to prove it was great
They set a date
And he got to rattle her bones

Tom Cruise was one of those jokes
Who women would take home to the folks
About Katy he's wild
And now that she's with child
He can go back to bonkin' blokes

Great, Thomasr. There goes the full glass MG suggested I pour myself. All through my nasal cavities, it went.

Very funny limericks! :)

Limericks! Of course I see that now but, in my head, they were raps and between them I was mentally adding "she/he told me to walk this way, talk this way"

*shrug*

Scientology is a bona fide religion.

*stares*

I've said it before and I'll say it again - Katie Holmes is an anthropomorphic dolphin.

Methinks Mr Cruise just wants some hot dolphin love, aka he is in fact Troy McClure, who you may remember from such sham marriages as Selma Bouvier and Nicole Kidman.

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Pity the cast isn't as good as the original.

Ruth Gordon was a great L. Ron.

Ratch,
I'll see your dolphin and raise you a cocker spaniel.

sorry to be a pedant. but i don't think dearth rhymes with worth. isn't it 'darth' as in vader?

[awaits wroth of anna. or is that rath?]

*spews blood*

*vows to not get a Videl Sassoon hair cut*

Tom will only look like Roman Polanski once he has completely assimilated Katie. If you look closely, you can see the fusing procedure has already begun.

it has! it has!

*yells for help*

somebody! stop them!

shit, I just realised I should have said:

"talk about your stockholmes syndrome . . ."

Dearth as in Mother Earth:
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=dearth
Middle English derthe, from Old English.

Oh and it's Wrath.

Toodle-pop
thomasr

sorry thomasr i was just trying to stir things a bit. can't help myself.

She can't, you know. It's like an obsession, only worse.